Express Yourself
why am i not a banana
Because your genetic code dictates that you are human. However, it should please you to know that you share 50 - 60% of your DNA with a banana.
thanks man
are you telling me that some people are 10% more banana than other people
(via skewed-beliefs)
my parents said to go to bed early
it is early
in the morning
(Source: daysofgay, via sexypeterpan)
Blueberry?
So I was reading up on Avengers trivia and apparently RDJ kept food hidden all over this set and they couldn’t find where it was so they just kinda let him continue doing it. So that’s his actual food he’s offering and whenever he’s eating in a scene, it’s not scripted. He was just hungry.
RDJ is a squirrel
I will never NOT reblog this
awesome just doesn’t quite cover it
(Source: kingtommens, via yaackie-dominguez)
i was at the bus stop with my sister the other day and for no apparent reason, she says: ‘dude, there are more dead people in the world than living people’ and the woman standing beside me whispered ‘holy shit’ and i fucking lost it
(via yaackie-dominguez)
tumblr has fallen
david karp is dead
yahoo is coming
your second sentence only has 5 syllables. Haiku fail. Though… they all do have 5, poem pass, haiku fail.
it wasn’t a haiku, it was a harry potter reference:
“the ministry has fallen
scrimgeour is dead
they are coming.”
(via gus-watersss)
So today in our english lesson a bird crashed into the window and one of the boys in the class used to have a bird and felt so upset he got permission from the teacher to go down all 4 flights of stairs to get the bird and bring it back up
and it sat through both the rest of English and History
(via sexypeterpan)
| Everyone at my school's idea of a relationship: | Someone asks someone "Will you go out with me?" and the other person says yes. They hug in the hallways, hold hands in the morning before the bell rings, and they kiss at lunch. They say "I love you" after two days. The whole school agrees that they are the cutest couple ever and hopes that they will last. |
| My idea of a relationship: | You start talking to each other and is in the "talking stage". One person asks you to go a date with them. You guys go a few more dates. You guys are dating. You guys act like a couple. You hug, you hold hands, you kiss. One person asks you to be their boyfriend/girlfriend. You guys are now officially a couple. You're in one of those relationships where you don't announce it to the whole world but you won't deny it if someone asked. You guys are comfortable around each other, you hang out outside of school. You say "I love you" when the time is right and when you actually mean it. |
why the fuck cant we text the police
lets say there is a murderer in ur house and you’re hiding behind your sofa and you do have your phone with you but you can’t call the police because the murderer might hear you
Relevant
(via sexypeterpan)
thank you once again
AH WHEN WILL THEY END
EVEN MORE OMFG
(Source: foreveralone-lyguy.tumnlr.com, via sexypeterpan)
I had my hands full but I needed to turn on my light
so I just used my mouth and flicked the switch up with my tongue
and then I realized
uh
oh
WHY DOESN’T THIS HAVE MORE NOTES?! THIS IS HILARIOUS!!!!
THIS IS THE BEST
his face tho
(via sexypeterpan)
